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a grand hello from the inside of my head. (WARNING: DO NOT ROCK.)

hello my friends…..

this is It. this is the month that i’ve been mythically telling myself about for, oh, 5 or 6 years now: the month where i clean out my entire fucking boston apartment, make my computer be organized, get back to a few thousand people (i shit you not) who have emailed be between the years of 2008 and 2011, and finally nail down how i’m going to do the next phase of my life. pile on top of that the small task of figuring out when i’m going to cut this next record, with whom, and where, and add one dose of Who the Fuck Do I Think I Am Anyway. that about nails things at the moment.

june and july were supposed to be empty. empty to be filled, that is. like cleaning the kitchen in order to cook a meal for 32 dinner guests.

for me, there’s no such thing as empty empty. like, just sit around and watch TV empty. i can do that for a few hours, and then i get frantic.
i like to get empty enough to make decisions about where the hell i’m headed.

and i know now. i just need to figure out how to do it.

all is not work. we went to the lexington 4th of july carnival last night.
it was me, super kate, casey long, noah briton, mali sastri, and ants (who you old school boston people will remember as the cross-dressing singer from Cho Experiment). my publicist aleix and his boyfriend brandon came along, too. some drunk girls in the ferris wheel car above us were laughing wildly and shouting to our car that they were going to pee off the side of the car. we laughed with them until they peed IN THEIR CAR and the pee DRIPPED ON OUR CAR LIKE RAIN for the rest of the ferris wheel ride. but it was actually kind of awesome. i can’t explain why. as neil would say: “because it was an adventure.”

noah changed his shirt. here he is on the next ride, disagreeing with the mandate on the thunder bolt before the ride started:


we watched the fireworks from the high school.
i was so happy to be with the people i was with, i almost cried. casey took this:


but also, i missed neil. sometimes i get tired of not being around him for most of my life. i called at him and yelled at him about how i loved him over the fireworks. that’s what you do. i tried to win him a big tacky I Love You bear at the balloon dart stand but all i got was a toucan. i’ll give him the toucan. it’s good enough. i think he might even like it better than the tacky I Love You bear. the boy running the booth was drunk (and possibly stoned) and tried to scheist me out of ten dollars.

meanwhile, noah might have gotten me a gig at a prison, because his friend is locked away for a long time in a mental ward there and his friend is an amanda palmer fan. he was telling me about the footage of the cramps playing at a california state mental hospital. i started wondering aloud what the BEST BAND EVER would be to play a prison. a band right now. across the board. who would win?
and noah said the footage of Young At Heart (the old old people) playing at a prison possibly put them in the running for best prison band ever.

i was trying to imagine taylor swift playing a prison. i tried to picture kimya dawson. then lady gaga. not doing it for the PR. like: lady gaga, if she had to play a prison and NEVER TELL ANYBODY ABOUT IT. what would she play? how would she make them happy? probably nobody would care what she was (or wasn’t) wearing – or maybe they would. i dunno.

i imagined myself sitting there in a prison in front of a few hundred inmates, some of them certified insane, probably none of them not knowing or giving a fuck “who i am,” and i found myself thinking: could i make them happy? seriously? how would i do it? and why would they care? especially in you’re in for life. like – how much do the bragging rights actually matter?

i’ve been wondering shit like this a lot lately.

as i embark on Whatever’s Next, i really have been wondering what the fuck the right decisions are. is it good to make a lot of people happy a little? or a little people happy a lot? is it possible to make a lot of people happy a lot? does it even matter? am i even making music to make people happy? why the fuck am i making music? i think one has to go through this process every time one makes a record.

i was also talking to kate, in the studio the other day, about how i’ve never given very much consideration to the direction my art has gone in. seems crazy and counter-intuitive, but it’s true.

i tend to make small impulsive choices based on whatever i’m feeling in the moment, and whatever looks like it’s going to float my boat in the right emotional direction.

but then i try to commit to that impulse 1000%. because i figure there’s no point in half-assing anything, even if the idea was sort of a random idea to begin with. isn’t every idea random? i’ve never WANTED to sit down and strategize my career. that sounds not only boring, but terrifying. i feel like the reason i got into this whole rock n roll racket int he first place was so i NEVER HAD TO DO THAT.

and i have to say, it’s pretty much worked. it’s never left me in the best financial situation, but things tend to come out in the wash, and i’ve never regretted a single decision.

it’s more or less in keeping with the “plan a only”/”fuck plan b” mentality. once you pick a “plan a” – you fucking make it happen until you’ve exhausted yourself. you beg, borrow and improvise and fake it ‘til you make it, and when all is done, it almost doesn’t matter if the plan worked or not. if you had a good time doing it, you’re still going to enjoy your end-of-the-day beer. if your goal was to enjoy the process of creation, and you did, you and your friends and co-workers can still slap each other on the back and say “well, THAT didn’t work. we did it! cheers!” while the pile of failure in front of you burns brightly to illuminate your party. not everybody works this way. and it doesn’t work for everybody.

so anyway: the last few weeks happened by accident, they weren’t supposed to happen, but they did. here’s why.

i was hanging out with michael mcquilken (who i have been in the horrible habit as referring to as “my ex”, but i have to get used to just calling him “my bandmate”), around the end of april.
i was filling him in on my next steps. about finding a band, touring, the whole nine yards. he just finished grad school, and got the idea that him and chad raines – his friend from yale who was also graduating from the drama department – would make an ideal back-up band. both of them are multi-instrmentalists, drama freaks, sound engineers and (i have a taste for these people) in the school of what i like to call the renaissance hacks. they do everything. so it was decided that we’d give a shot at playing as a trio and that the guys would help me cut demos of my new songs.

most of the songs aren’t actually new. most of the songs were written in 2009, with a couple of newer ones sneaking in.

things effect things. in my self-managed life, business and the team has driven the art output. i’ve been trying for the last three years – since “Who Killed Amanda Palmer” came out – to put together a management team who will actually work well together and make the business Go. it’s been a tricky and tedious process: i’ve had almost 7 configurations of management and teams since going solo.
it’s been a haul. each album that i’ve released since the solo album (evelyn evelyn, the radiohead EP, the australian record) has been a test-run to see how to do things – what goes right, what goes wrong, how it works and how it doesn’t.

and i’m finally getting close – close enough to be ready to break ground on the record of real-ass songs that i’ve had piling up on the piano since “Who Killed Amanda Palmer” got recorded.
which is why, when michael suggested he & chad help me cut the demos, i said:

“yes: but in the fall”.

michael pressed me to do it this summer.

i said “no. in the fall. my apartment is a mess. my computer is a mess. my head is a mess. i know the deal. if i start cutting demos for a record, i’m going to start making a fucking record. i won’t be able to stop. i need the off time.”

he won. we did it. we did it last week. we cut demos. and before we went into record, we played three shows to tweak and test the material live.

and maybe i was wrong about the not being able to stop myself: i physically can’t do what i can’t do….i LITERALLY can’t start this record tomorrow. not with all of august booked in scotland for the fringe and a fall mini-tour with neil already in the works (more on that below).

so; the record can’t be made until later fall/early winter at the soonest – spring at the latest.

but i’m glad i did things this way, for lots of reasons.

one: i now know that my new songs, post-arranging, sounds as amazing as i thought they would. i don’t need to stress it in my brain. they sound BETTER. this feeds me and keeps me going like a ten-foot multivitamin battery. not to pat myself on the back or anything (too late) but i think these are some of the best songs i’ve ever written. some of the saddest. and happiest. and the danciest. all around…i’m proud, i feel like i’ve stretched and jumped and hurled myself over a pole vault pole. except nobody was watching. nobody will know until this album comes out. that’s such a bitch, i have to say.

two: i can now sally forth on my summer catch-up and off-time armed with my demos, which are going to create the template for the record itself, and they’ll be invaluable when talking to the producer-y engineer-y people about direction. we still don’t know exactly where we’re going to cut this record for real.

three: i have found a couple of musicians that rock the shit out of the park. we’ll be touring this summer as a trio, but we may add things later as needed. but my search is over, before it even began, actually.

four: amanda palmer fans actually do dance. hard. they just need permission. and warm-up exercises.


even if we cut this album in the late fall, i SHOULD get enough time to decompress & recompose my life in an organized manner, if i shake my ass. yesterday kate and i spent 4 solid hours finally clearing out, tagging and de-mystifying the old dresden dolls rehearsal space, which has held ghosts of tours past for going on ten years.


i now know how many kurzweil power adaptors i own. (8).

and how many male-to-female XLR cables (about a dozen).

and how many keyboard stands. (9).

and how many promotional australian “yes. virginia” posters. (don’t ask).

and how many old, moldy, cob-web-covered and slightly terrifying dresden-doll hyrda-heads that someone once sculpted and gave me that i simply could not bear to part with:


i do plan to put together a webcast to hock some of this odd promo-poster/random shit out of the basement. stay tuned for that.

and today we hit the email.

and in the next few days i’m going to post a blog with some pictures from the shows we need, and from the studio….i’m still compiling. i might even throw together a little teaser, using a snippet from one of the demos (we’ll see).


i got SUCKED into the other night. somebody (well, @meltinghalo to be exact) started a #LOFNOTC room and i’d heard so much about from my hip friends that i finally decided to go check it out. it addicted me instantly. i felt horrible that the international set (outside the US) couldn’t take part (plus – for the time being? – you need to use facebook to login)…apparently JUST got shut out of the ex-america markets.
WHEN WILL THE WORLD WAKE UP AND REALIZE SHIT LIKE THIS IS GOOD AND NOT BAD FOR THE MUSIC INDUSTRY? good lord. let’s pray for that to get sorted. meanwhile…neil got hooked too, and has been doing impromptu DJ parties over there that he posts likes to via his twitter, and i will be hitting that shit when i feel like it. it’s basically a virtual room where people trade DJing songs, comment, chat and rate the music. it took me about 15 minutes to figure out how it worked, and after a few hours of fun i closed the night out with my cover of rebecca black’s “friday” (recorded just last weekend at the bell house in brooklyn). if i organize anything non-impromptu, i’ll hit the blog with info so you can plan your own little dance party.
here’s a screen cap from all the little animals hopping and bopping to NIN’s cover of soft cell’s “memorabilia” (@trentvanegas was spinning, while we were trying to convince neil to join in on the fun):


and i asked on twitter if anybody had any questions. i cut and pasted and am answering HERE.
while i’m in mad-catch-up mode, this IS a good time to ask questions, so hit me in the comments, which i always read, and i’ll start formatting the blogs with more Q&A each time around…if i don’t get lazy.

@amandapalmer What are you up to when you’re in England in September?

i’m up to these shows:


TIME: 9PM | AGES: 16+ | TIX: £12-£13


TIME: 9PM | AGES: 16+ | TIX: £12-£13


TIME: 9PM | AGES: 16+ | TIX: £12-£13


TIME: 9PM | AGES: 16+ | TIX: £12-£13


TIME: 9PM | AGES: 16+ | TIX: £12-£13



TIME: 7PM | AGES: 14+ | TIX: £14


TIME: 7PM | AGES: 16+ | TIX: £14


TIME: 7PM | AGES: 14+ | TIX: £14.50
(under 16s with adults over 18)


TIME: 7PM | AGES: 14+ | TIX: £16.50
(under 16s with adults over 18)

LONDON @ ???

SAVE THE DATE (and the night before)
secret-mystery-gig info coming soon! RSVP for info


TIME: 7PM | AGES: ALL | TIX :€25


TIME: 8:30PM | AGES: ALL | TIX: :€16.50

and apart from that, i’m planning on spending a few weeks OFF at the fringe in edinburgh. if you have any recommendations of bands or plays to see while at the fringe, HIT ME. i’m starting my list as we speak.

@amandapalmer if you can reveal anything about the visit to SF from you and @neilhimself this November, we’d love to hear about it.

neil and i are indeed plotting a little neil-and-amanda hit the west coast tour for early november. i’m about to announce a west coast halloween show with jason webley, too. neil and i will DEFINITELY be hitting san francisco, and i expect all these tickets will vanish soon after going on sale, so your best bet to get tickets, as always, is to get on the MAILING LIST, where we alway announce first.

@amandapalmer when do you expect the new album to be out?!

given all the x factors, it’ll be sometime as early as next spring and as late as summer/fall. i’ve learned my lesson…i ain’t saying anything fo shizzle.
when it does come out, i’ll probably be touring on it for the better part of a year, so i want to make sure everything is in ship fucking shape before i head out.

@amandapalmer you probably get this a lot.. but any more reunion things for the dresden dolls?

why funny you should ask. yes, indeed. we’re plotting something for this winter. but location is yet to be revealed. i just saw brian at our show in brooklyn and he was looking smashing as always.

@amandapalmer Whatever happened to the “No Surprises” video?

this one’s been a long time coming, i know. it got buried in the endless project chaos of last year, and we decided to hang onto it and wait for a special reason to release it instead of just dropping it randomly into the world. there’s a good chance we’re going to re-print and (finally) distribute the radiohead EP, and this’ll be a nice tie-in with that. so expect it in the not-too-distant future. it’s really a beautiful animated video, i’m sorry it’s been hiding under a rock for so long.

@amandapalmer Did you ever post the wedding blog?

no. i didn’t. and people keep asking me about it. if i had a dollar for every huge blog i got 95% finished and didn’t post, i’d have like forty-seven dollars.
it’s been an enigma, that blog. i’ve re-written in a few times now and it’s just sitting there in my drafts folder, unwilling to be launched into the internet.

i think it’s a combination of things. my relationship with neil is ever-evolving. daily. it seems like i always have something different to say. marriage itself, weddings, the ritual – its all symbolic. and i feel like i can never quite get a handle on how to explain the thing to people. you might be shocked to hear that not everybody in the world is supportive of the fact that i got married. sometimes i feel like i have to defend the action. i’ve looked at the blog and wondered if that defensiveness is informing at all. because it can’t. it shouldn’t. so i am wishy-washy. it’ll come out when the time is right. it’ll be the right time.

@amandapalmer Any plans to come to Greece any time soon? We kinda feel left out…

dude, i’d love to come to greece. i know there are lots of fans there.
i’ve been spending a lot of my mental calculations trying to figure out where i am going to tour when this new record drops, and how i can use the internet to figure out WHERE people are. it doesn’t hurt when you ask…so i know you’re there. when i get some sort of system running. there’s lots of online things like and other platforms for collective voices about where artists are demanded, but i’ve yet to figure out what’s perfect for AFP-land. stay tuned. or if you have advice, hit me in the comments.

@amandapalmer when can we expect the @EvelynEvelyn graphic novel?

a HA! this is an easy one, and i’m so happy to announce it’s coming out in october. it looks BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!! cynthia von buhler NAILED the artwork: it’s really a gorgeous graphic novel and i can’t wait for you guys to see it. jason and cynthia and i will be shouting about it’s release from the rooftops as soon as we know exactly when it will be punch.

more soon, my loves.


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  • Lexie Young

    Hey Amanda. Excited as ever for the upcoming album and anything else you’re gonna throw at us. I think it would be an awesome idea to sell off any uneededunused dresden dolls merch and goodies. I would love to buy random dresden dolls stuff, and i’m pretty positive a lot of people would pay good money for it. A reunion tourshow sounds like an amazing idea as well. Hopefully I’ll get to catch you at a show sometime or another.
    love, an underage fan (hint hint)

    Also, in response to other aspects of your post, your music does make a lot of people happy. Including myself. Not only that though, it inspires people. You doing what you want because it’s what you want, is a inspiring thing in itself. That’s just what I think.

  • Mel

    I have a quick question then. Will the Bed Song be on the new record? I’m dying for a good version of it, beyond the Youtube world. =]

  • Idolon

    I’m so excited for the new record!  I am an AFP fan and I love to dance, especially to dance-y 80s music.

  • Laura

    Pretty please come back to Australia when the new album is done? I really really really unbelievably want to see you, seeing as it didn’t quite happen with all the Christchurch shenanigans…

    Also if you and Brian felt like coming to Australia I certainly wouldn’t object…

    But I’m not fussy, I’m just keen to see you live, like I’ve wanted for a looooooong time XXX

  • therealtizzielizzie

    Cannot WAIT for you and Neil in SF! 

  • Allisonbyproxy

    Wonderful blog as always Amanda. When you do tour for the new record please please please come to, or close to, Ohio. I’ve been dying to see you live but just haven’t had the opportunity. Can’t wait to buy the shit out of the new record. Love always.

  • lizz

    //good to make a lot of people happy a little? or a little people happy a lot? is it possible to make a lot of people happy a lot? does it even matter? am i even making music to make people happy? why the fuck am i making music? i think one has to go through this process every time one makes a record.//

    Do what makes you happy – there will always be haters, but if you like the music that you are making a) the true fans will follow and b) you’ll be able to look back on your catalogue and be proud. It is kind of funny to me to think here is this person who just exudes confidence and talent having the same gut-wrenching argument with herself over what other ppl think. Kind of makes me feel better in a bit of a schadenfreude way. 

  • the dUKEss of Rock

    is it OK to recommend myself as an Edinburgh show?
    I have four 30 minutes busking slots:Wed, August 24th, 5:30pm
    Thu, August 25th, 1:30pm
    Fri and Sun, August 26th and 28h, 11:00am[All shows are outside St. Giles Cathedral in Parliament Square.]It’s a Shakespearean Ukulele act. Which means Shakespearean monologues meet modern songs from Lady Gaga, Radiohead and more.I’d love to see you there, with/without your uke. If I see you there I promise to cover one of your songs (“The Bed Song” and “The Truth” are two of my all time fav songs to cover).More details here:

  • PolitelyOffend

    Great blog. The shows were amazing, as were the songs. I haven’t seen a crowd as into a show as the crowd at the Brooklyn show. The entire week kicked my ass into gear and I’ve been writing songs and learning guitar ever since. Being around that many people with such a high level of talent and work ethic is seriously inspiring. Thanks for the awesome shows and for working so hard at what you do.
    X O

  • Chelsey Blair

    Psh, of course Amanda Fucking Palmer fans dance.

    (at least I do.)


  • gB

    Hey Amanda.

    I’m just wondering if there’s any word on the DVD release of the Needle That Sings In Her Heart performance.  AFP+NMH=<3
    (Not that you don't have a million other things going on.)

    • Nicole

      I was totally wondering about this too… That and the Cabaret soundtrack that was apparently in the works. 

  • Dinah Sanders

    Hi Amanda,

    Good going on the epic Discardia/brain sorting adventure! Rowr! Excelsior!

    When you come to San Francisco, I’m betting you will be happy about the food and drink and statue of Emperor Norton at Comstock Saloon. Tasty things.

  • sandi

    Hi Amanda, 

    When you’re planning your tour next year, keep Colorado in mind. We love you here. 


  • Tim Volk

    Any word on when the 2010 NYC Halloween Dresden Dolls concert is coming out?

  • Clare

    Shiet, Texas needs your dulcet piano slaying. Even if it’s the ass-end of El Paso — please, not the ass-end of El Paso — I’d make the drive.

  • Rachel Lynn

    I’m glad to hear that AFP fans can dance. It felt like I was the only one dancing when I saw The Dresden Dolls on Halloween. Me and the high school couple in front of me.

  • Crimsong19

    I definitely think that Neil will enjoy the toucan. *smiles*
    Oooooh, can’t wait to finally get the Evelyn Evelyn graphic novel! And all the future news (the album, touring, etc.) is getting me all excited! :D
    – Jason

  • Sara Benjamin

    “Who the Fuck Do I Think I Am Anyway.” I loved that line. Who the fuck is anybody? The other thought of making lots of people a little happy vs less people very happy, I would say, there is probably a ‘time for both,’ but which one makes you love what you do more? All I can say is having your show in small venues, with all that crowd participation, is so freaking incredible (as a concert goer). As for playing in prison, I used to go sing for old folks in the nursing home every couple of weeks. They didn’t care how we looked (or even sounded particularly), they used to care that we showed up and made some noise.  Luck with all you have to do. I hope you come back to play in Brooklyn soon. 

  • Stephanie K.

    I literally clapped my hand over my mouth at the “neil and i are indeed plotting a little neil-and-amanda hit the west coast tour for early november. i’m about to announce a west coast halloween show with jason webley, too.”
    Eeeep!! I might finally get to see y’all live. *crosses fingers*

  • fallen_woman

    It’s telling that you’re trying to think of what makes other people happy when you perform…  I like that you’re not trying to work out what makes you happy – you already know the answer to that.  I like that you’re not trying to make a particular point – your work is your point.  I don’t know the right answer for you, but I do have complete faith that you’ll sort it out.

    I’m not sure that I dance to your music much, but there’s definitely singing along, squeezing my eyes shut and throwing horns.  That counts, doesn’t it?

    Right where I am, I’m raring to go on my career.  The revving is intense but I can’t actually get into gear yet because of 891240912896 things I have to take care of first.  This is a career, not a specific artistic project where I could just write myself a part and act it out, record it and…bingo! career!  I guess the analogue for you would be shopping your demos and trying to convince friends and family to support you through your salad days.  On the one hand i just want to jump past this step and wish I had a network of people begging for my attention, email boxes to clean out, a desperation for time to think, on the other hand it’s almost calming to think that even past this step and the working furiously step, there is still the trying to work out What’s Next step.

    So I breathe deep.  Look at starting a new blog, review photos I’ve taken as possibilities for art on my material, research commercial demo producers and practice, practice, practice.

    Patience.  and determination.

  • TheDebster

    What’s up, Amanda? Do you find any of your songs hard to play live, like emotionally draining?

  • Becca Sklar

    I absolutely LOVED your Hoboken show. It was the first time I saw you and truth be told, I was only first
    introduced to your music less than 2 months ago from a friend I randomly met on facebook. But I quickly became a
    fan and learned a lot about you. I loved what I learned which just made
    me love you more beyond your musical talent. I think quite highly of you, you’re an amazing person. You were so sweet to sign my Who Killed Amanda Palmer book ahead of that line cause my brother was making me leave >_< wish I could have stayed longer. I was reading your past blogs, and read how a fan started a "grab my boobs for a picture" thing, I wanted to try to start that XD but didn't, maybe next time lol.

    By the way, sorry for the lack of dancing at that show, we'll do better next time =] I hope you come back soon so we can prove ourselves better!!!!

    Much Love and Respect

  • Lmpiggyon

    Hello Didn’t know if you had heard about this:
    Love to you

  • phantasmagoriam

    “@amandapalmer you probably get this a lot.. but any more reunion things for the dresden dolls?”
    funny you should ask. yes, indeed. we’re plotting something for this
    winter. but location is yet to be revealed. i just saw brian at our show
    in brooklyn and he was looking smashing as always.”

    hurrayhurrayhurray! so much hurray!
    (even though it’s most likely ‘only’ the US. hurray!)

    • Roger_johnson

      But if you just keep smiling and dreaming and enjoying life, nice things happen, Amanda came to Australia this year, we drove 4,000 klm’s, round trip to see her and I asked her the same question and received the reply… “The Dresden Dolls may darken your shores” so I’m just smiling and dreaming and…

  • phantasmagoriam

    oops, double.

  • liti kjersti

    norway, norway, norway, PLEASE.  please. please. please. 

    i always enjoy reading your blog, oh so very much. i think i’ve said it before, but all your wonderful thoughts + your ability to be exhausted and happy for most of the time, even when you’re kind of not… it helps. and your whole “do it, do it, do it” outlook on everything you want to do has definitely helped push me in one of the directions i need to go: i’ve started working, like, for real, on my book. which i’ve named “dear oslo.” the idea sprouted from my absolute, heart sickening, complete love for my hometown, every stone and pebble, the river, the buildings, the smells, the people. it’s coming along, incredibly slowly (i’m sort of long term sick, so i can’t really make a “job” out of it), but it’s coming along. 
    by the way. i spoke, extremely briefly, to tristan allen on twitter a few months ago, asking him if he’d be interested in me writing some flash fiction/really short stories/stuff based on the songs of his record. he was very enthusiastic about it. i dunno, just seemed like something you’d like to know.

    • speilbilde

      I second the “Norway” for possible shows.  :3 I’d love that a lot, although I could easily make it to a show in Sweden as well. 

  • Jenna H

    Finland, please! Or anywhere in Scandinavia for that matter, I’d blow all my sorry savings if it were possible to get to see you. :) You make people happier & inspired & more confident all around the world, so dearest Amanda – thank you for being you.

    Lots of love :+ :+ :+

  • Allison Hom

    man, i am so STOKED that a new full length album is in the works. the WKAP wave had already settled by the time i became a fan, so i haven’t really gotten to experience a big release of yours yet. i have, however, fallen in love with every single project you’ve done in the last year or two, but it will be nice to see a release again that’s more, shall we say, invested in, rather than a recording just done for fun (though that’s also valid, and wonderful too). 

    as a fan, i tend to emotionally invest very heavily in your music. and i know that that fact is daunting, but i know you know it is too, and that is so much a part of why i’m such a huge fan. what i love most about all of your work is your raw honesty, and incredible expression of all the ways there are to be human (both high, low, and just plain silly) that keep me hooked on your music, and on the general way that you do business.

    so, then there is the question: why do you do what you do, and what is going to make people happy? i’ve read on your blog before that above loving music, the main reason you write and perform it is because of the way it lets you connect to people; to reach out; to not feel alone. i am a fan because i am desperately reaching back. your music and your weird Internet Community make me feel Connected, like nothing else.

    so the real, and very vague, answer to the question is to make what YOU make, whatever it is. just make it honest, like you always do. and if you invest your time and emotions in the music, i promise that the rest of us will too.

    can’t wait :)

  • lentower

    the next album will be even more epic for the hiatus

    i always assume your projects will happen when they happen,
    but most people like estimates.  sigh

    cleaning up your apt and spaces will be a creative bonanza.
    go for it

  • Félix Marqués

    All these news are marvelous as long as, please, whatever you do, when you’re finally on the big tour for the next awesome album, you come to Spain.

    Nobody loves Spain. In 2008, I learnt both about you and Emilie Autumn, when you had just toured over here, and then both of you never came back in subsequent tours. Obviously, I can’t travel to France to see Evelyn Evelyn. Lady Gaga almost didn’t even come to Madrid last year until a surge of flashmobs happened with people dancing to “Bad Romance” and “Telephone” in the streets. Most big bands go to France and do more than five gigs in the UK and don’t give a shit about us.

    I mean, look at Finland. They have Nightwish and Sonata Arctica and
    Apocalyptica and all those usually awesome metal bands, successful worldwide. I mean, fuck,
    have you ever heard about Hevisaurus? It’s a we-dress-up-like-like-dinosaurs metal band, they’re like
    Finland’s Teletubbies but oibiously over nine thousand times better—and their only record so far is awesome.

    Spain is overall in a horrible state when it comes to art, and art funding, and art teaching, and overall promotion of culture. After the dictatorship ended in the 70’s, no effort has been made to start doing any effort in that direction. We don’t even have any really great musicians, we just have a couple of excessively famous horrible poster boys (like Bisbal) making awful godawful pop music (it’s even worse than American one, I assure you—in levels of blandness and uncreativity). Except for some decent enough rock bands, like Mägo de Oz or Vetusta Morla, and they’re no Björk precisely.

    This is very frustrating because during the Second Republic, at the beginning of the 20th Century, there was for the first time an attempt on the part of the government to promote and help distribute art and culture. The result? Picasso, Dalí, García Lorca, Luis Buñuel all grew up and did amazing shit and changed the world. Until the Civil War came and Lorca was murdered by a man who shot him in the ass, “a shot for being a commie, the other for being a fag”.

    I digress, but what I mean is that we’re a shitty country where nobody gives a fuck about letting us make art, and that coupled with all the prejudice and bullshit and misconceptions means we aren’t precisely surrounded by interesting stuff, which means it’s even worse when nobody cares to come.

    Not saying you don’t care to come, just pointing out it’d be awesome if you did.

    BTW, instead of doing the typical “let’s go to Madrid and Barcelona”, perhaps you’d like to do a gig in Pamplona? : D

    • Amanda Palmer

      wow. art history lesson from a real spaniard….thank you.

      • Amanda Palmer

        and yes, this time, i come.

  • Raekat

    Amanda, pleaseeee tour somewhere near kentucky/Indiana/Ohio!
    I know you recently did (and said you didn’t know when/if you’d ever be back), but I always am dying to see you.

  • Lauren S.

    Hi Amanda,

    I think playing at a jail/prison/mental institution is a wonderful idea. Even if nobody knows about it, even if it won’t make you the next Cash. Because the people in there are going through things that most of us (myself included) can’t even fathom,  and the fact that someone is there TRYING to bring them some happiness and treat them like human beings would make a great deal of difference. Even if they hate it, they can at least have a welcome distraction from the monotony and struggle of their situation for a little while. Even if they hate your music, people remember when you show them kindness.

  • Lauren S.

    Hi Amanda,
    I think playing at a jail/prison/mental institution is a wonderful idea. Even if nobody knows about it, even if it won’t make you the next Cash. Because the people in there are going through things that most of us (myself included) can’t even fathom,  and the fact that someone is there TRYING to bring them some happiness and treat them like human beings would make a great deal of difference. Even if they hate it, they can at least have a welcome distraction from the monotony and struggle of their situation for a little while. Even if they hate your music, people remember when you show them kindness.

  • Lady Cariad

    Dear Amanda,

    I am bloody over the moon you’re going to be in Edinburgh. I’m doing my first solo show there this year, and you’re blog genuinely gives me a kick up the ass to keep going, whenever I feel like, why am i doing this? Is this even funny? I remember fuck plan b, and it helps. It helps to remind me I’m not doing this for other people to say well done, but because i owe it to myself to do what i want. 

    I don’t know how much you want to see comedy up there, but it might make a nice break from all the theatre and the being awesome. My show is on in the afternoon, and it’s free (well i stand there with a bucket at the end and look forlorn and also threatening) but basically it’s free. So, if you’d like to see that, here’s the info.

    Ugh, sorry for the self-promotion, I just genuinely think you’d enjoy it, especially as i open with a Dresden Dolls song, so that’s got to be good right? Also you might like, or indeed anyone else who follows you and this blog, and is therefore a bit super, Sara Pascoe, Josie Long and Jess Fostekew, all super-lady-comics at the fringe as well.

    Thank you, I can’t wait to see your gig in Edinburgh, and yeah, just bashful, but grateful english thanks. ahem. 

    Cariad x

  • Jar

    Like some others I also came in late as a fan and have been afraid that ive missed out on something amazing.. and I share the excitement about a new album and the possibility of west coast shows (the thoughts got me grinning right now) But about tour planning, just for shits and giggles you or someone close should start a global pin map just to see how widespread your fan base is, if nothing else it might make you smile just to see how many pins represent some AFP love all over the world. i started one here
    but you can start over and link it here and probably twitter.. have some fun with it.
    Encouraging warm wishes..

  • gattopardo

    dear Amanda, wow, that was one punch-packing, vitamined-up post! Congratulations on all the sorting (material and mental), decision-making, scheduling, plotting and anticipating you have going on. I am also breathless with excitement after reading about your material for the upcoming album. Congrats on that too and for being on such a blissed-out state of creativeness. 
    Just a quick word to say I smiled inwardly at your toucan and fireworks phone-call to Neil. Sigh. Loving long-distance will do that to you. Picking up at phone mid-something exciting/heart-stoppingly beautiful or apparently totally random, just because you’re hit hard – 18-wheeler style-  by the absolute need to share it with your special person. Your story really resonated with me and I just wanted to say, for what its worth, I understand and empathize, you’re not alone. (did that sound slightly stalker-y or just plain cheesy? ah well, have it any way you please. lol.) 
    Also, whatever your personal reasons  for making music, allow me to say that you are making at least one person extremely… happy. And not just in the sense of “oh hell yeah I so love this, this song is rockin'” but in the “thank Dog, somebody is actually making sense out of all this and I am just as much as a nut-job as I thought I was and its fine.” You’ve made me feel a heck of a lot of things and I’m so much the better for it.  So thank you and please, carry on. Admiring hugs and love.

    PS- thanks to you I now know what a “male-to-female XLR cable” is. 

  • Her

    You are amazing. I read your blog all the time and that’s all I ever want to say, so I don’t comment that frequently to save myself from looking like a psycho.

    I know you said plays, but Mark Watson the comedian is at Fringe and he is absolutely lovely,  and very funny so I would recommend him. He’s been writing a blog every day for the past year and a bit. It’s going on for 10 years as part of a wider self improvement plan (TYSIC – ten year self improvement challenge). He writes too, his latest is a book called Eleven and it’s about how we’re all kind of connected. He is amazing and he makes the world better.

    Anyway, what I was wanting to ask, as a question to you and anyone who might read this is, how do you get control of self doubt? I hate asking stuff like this, because it is totally impossible to answer, and makes me sound like kind of an arse besides. It’s just become a massive problem for me, and I have no idea how to get past it. I write, but I am terrified to show anyone any of it. Not exactly unusual, I know. But sometimes, even though it’s the only thing I really love doing, I can’t even do it because the part of me telling me that I suck is so fucking loud I can’t even hear my own ideas. And then there’s the talking to people thing. Something I essentially can’t do. I am so awkward, and because of that very few people even want to give me the time of day because… well, I guess they assume that because I’m “quiet” I’m not thinking anything. I don’t even know how to appear worth talking to. I just  find it amazing how you talk about the doubts that you have, but then you just blast through them like they don’t even matter. If I even tried all anyone would ask is what the fuck do I think I’m doing?

    Everything that you do helps me feel like I might figure it out. Which I really need. So yay for a new album. Thank you.

    • gattopardo

      dear Her, thanks for writing this, I feel far less alone now. I am sorry but I have very little by way of wise advice to impart on the subject of tackling self-doubt. I have found out however that, no matter how bad/unoriginal/weird-sounding or irrelevant I find my writing or what anyone would think of it, I need to write it, I need to work this stuff out of my system and onto the page. So even if I fill notebooks with scribbling that find their way into the back of a cupboard… Not that I’m advocating this at all Her, I’m sure you’d find helpful supportive people to give you honest feedback if you trusted yourself a little more and gave them the benefit of the doubt. Hey, looks who’s talking, I only show my stuff to one person (and only have for the last 3 months) and I only about 1/10 of what I write. And sometimes I show one or two friends little snippets but without telling them I wrote them (lame I know… lol). But all this to say that maybe you are undermining yourself just a little… maybe people dont approach you because they think you are too deep in thought. I am sure you appear very worth talking to (big arrow pointing at me writing to you ;)) 
      Go with your gut feeling, write away for better or worse, if you’ve got it in you wanting to bust out onto paper, do it. Do it for yourself first and foremost. If its coming from an honest place, I’m sure it will resonate with someone and in time you’ll get the input and incentive you need and want. 
      But its just my opinion. Best of luck with your writing endeavours and life in general :)  

      • Her

         Thank you. x

    • Shloobee

      Lovely Her, if there’s a person in this world who doesn’t hear the “you suck” voices in their head, I’d be very surprised. You need to turn them into a “why the fuck not me?” voice instead. Easier said than done, but when you think about it, that’s all people with confidence are doing. Let the doubts in, then turn around and kick them in the tits. Get outraged. Why shouldn’t it be you? Those people with confidence? Deep down most of them question themselves as much as you do, but they plough on through because, it seems to me anyway, they have to keep going – they’re impelled to create, to grab attention, validation, to show their wares, as it were. Keep writing, Gattopardo is absolutely right, if you love it, keep at it. So many people don’t know what they love, never find the “thing” that’s theirs. That you have suggests a good mind to me, for what it’s worth. If you don’t believe in you, no one else will, why should they? You are your own best advocate. Rock it.
      As to the talking to other people, I’m crappy at it too. I panic the whole time I’m with others and never seem to be able to find much common ground or think of anything coherent to say. You’re not alone, especially with the awkward thing. I spend my time thinking “don’t say that, don’t do that, oh you idiot!” and nobody notices it. That’s the killer punch. Nobody notices my panic, they just think I’m a bit intense or, sometimes, a bit of a loon. Again, Gattopardo’s right. People probably just think you are deep in thought. I use that as a weapon or shield sometimes. When I don’t want to talk to people, I stare off into the distance and put my thinky face on, or I smile to myself about something. You’d be surprised how many people don’t want to interrupt. 
      Give yourself a break, lovely. If people think “who the fuck does she think she is?” give them the two finger salute and keep right on going. There’s no reason in this world why it shouldn’t be you. If “they” don’t like it, fuck ‘em. 

      • Her

        Thank you. I am really going to try.  x

  • Jess

    The thing with happiness is that it spreads. It’s like if I’m having a shitty day and someone is nice to me for no reason, just pleasant and happy, then I feel better and I feel happy. Maybe my being happy will infect someone else and so on and so forth. Don’t worry about numbers, you just have to be happy yourself.

  • Soilsifter

    I know what you can do to make the inmates happy.  Bring them a puppy.  A really cute, friendly puppy that will lick their faces, make them laugh and give them unconditional love.  Forget the songs and the presents.  Bring them a puppy. That is what they want.

  • kmwilliams

     Just to quickly FEELYOU & fist-bump one sentiment: I totally understand the hesitation regarding posting the wedding blog. I had a very long involved conversation recently regarding marriage (what it means, what it shouldn’t mean, what some people think it means, its history and, more particularly, its history (and present and future) from a feminist perspective)  with a few fellow feminists (female & male, straight & gay). Very mixed feelings. VERY mixed. And some very interesting points were batted back and forth (and back and forth.. and back and forth.) I can easily believe that some people you know might not be happy that you got married. I know that some of my friends wouldn’t be thrilled if I got married..  for various reasons… some more personal, some more political.

    Don’t post it if you don’t want to. Your blog, your marriage, your choice.

  • Soilsifter

    In addition to the puppy, they want a clean, soft blanket and pillow that they don’t have to share with anyone else.  They want some homebaked goods and they want a girl who really is pretty and kind to smile at them sweetly and tell them that they haven’t done anything wrong and that it is all going to be okay.  They might not tell you that if you asked them, but deep down, that is what they really want.
    All of them.

  • Sadie

    “you might be shocked to hear that not everybody in the world is supportive of the fact that i got married.”

    Amanda, usually you are pretty aware of the state of the world, but I think you’re missing a big cultural point here.  In an age where entire groups of people are struggling for the right to legally commit themselves to each other, when someone who has historically belittled and dismissed marriage as a concept  gets married in an extremely performative way, not everyone will be supportive, because you’re not being sensitive to the fact that while you are lucky enough to get married, not everyone can. 

    I am not saying that you shouldn’t have gotten married.  I just hoped that as someone surrounded by queer people, you would have somehow acknowledged that your change of heart to avail yourself of a right you’d previously scorned could be offensive to the people who have dreamed of those same rights for years.   Don’t you think that your friends Lance Horne or Juan Son (or  your own Chaos Team-ers Beth, Sean & Hayley) would also like the opportunity to have weddings and legal marriages to their current or future partners?

    I am sure I’m going to get flamed because I’m not falling all over myself to tell you how awesome it is that you got married.  It’s great that you got married.  It would just be nice to see someone who’s built her empire on the backs of the freak community (including us queers) acknowledge that she’s lucky and not everyone is yet. 

    • Mika Gonzales

      Just because she is a public figure does not mean that she must commit every bit of her life to her public image. She is happy, let her be happy. :D

    • Tara Dawes

      Marriage can be a beautiful thing – I hope one day everyone gets to do it, but honestly the fact that our government can’t get their heads out of their asses on the subject doesn’t mean that everyone needs to stop living their lives and cease getting married.  I look forward to the day that I can attend the weddings of my friends and relatives who are gay, but I wasn’t going to postpone my wedding waiting for that day to come (nor did they expect me to) and Amanda shouldn’t have to either.  As a “fan” if she is happy then I am happy for her.  

    • Paula Cuccurullo

      Awww man.  My husband and I probably would have happily shacked up over marrying, but because I needed residency we had to get married for me to stay overseas.  Plus my family was happy, and I love an excuse to party. ;)  But we had a friend who refused to come to our wedding because she didn’t support the institution of marriage – gay, straight or any other way (she’s lesbian, but in this case that fact is neither here nor there).   Though we wanted to understand, it really hurt that she couldn’t just be happy for us, and we were never really as close after that.   I am thrilled for my gay friends that the tide towards marriage equality is turning so they have the same choices I did, but I still give support and big love to anyone who wants to and can pledge their forevers to the loves of their lives. :)  *hugs t0 Neil and Amanda* xx

  • marthamay

    As I read your thoughts on a possible prison show, I was honestly a little bit jealous. The Amanda Palmer we all know is Amanda Fucking Palmer. You’re a show in and of yourself. But in your prison show ideas, you discussed how much of that show, of that Amanda Fucking Palmer, would really matter to them. From your thoughts, if you were to play a show in a prison, it might be the most intimate show you could ever perform. You’d strip away all the cabaret, all that extra stuff that makes you Amanda Fucking Palmer, and you would just be Amanda. You would be showing your true self, rather than the person your fans know and expect you to be. And I am jealous. I truly hope that you choose to do it, even though I will never see it.

  • MariMarzipan

    :O West Coast in November?? How exciting! If it’s possible, I would love if you and Neil can hit Reno, Nevada (or, I guess, Northern California… but those buggers get all the glory. :P) We have a decent scene here that would be properly appreciative of ninja gigs, I think. Please keep us updated!

  • Paul MacFarlane

    Hi Amanda 
    Paul(old StL fan since 2003 now living in Aspen here) But…Do NOT read this. Just chill, breathe and smile.

  • Alexandra Kayle

    Hi Amanda, would you ever be interested in coming to South Africa? The music industry here is amazing and has a hugely vibrant culture. We’d love to see you live! :)

  • Chris Perley

    Amanda, I was one of the lucky Yanks in the Turntable room when the NiN song played. I had never heard it before. I think it’s quite possibly my new favorite song of theirs! And I LOVED your version of “Friday”. Had me in stitches.

    Very excited to hear of upcoming West Coast shows. We’d love to see you back at the Largo (BEST. VENUE. EVER.)

    Can’t wait for the Evelyn Evelyn graphic novel. Anything new about the sisters would be much appreciated.


    p.s. If you need help getting rid of the promotional Australian “Yes. Virginia” posters, I’d be happy to buy a few from you. :-)

  • Mika Gonzales

    My goodness, you could never read all of these, but I’d like to say that your true fans love you for you.  Never doubt your gut instinct decisions, as you’ve stated its how you naturally create. You’re amazing, and your tendency to over-analyze  yourself  is tragic. Fuck what the world thinks, love yourself as your fans do, for being yourself.

  • Sammy

    I recommend coming to Maui. You’ve never been to Hawaii have you? We never have any concerts here, when bands come to Hawaii (hardly ever) they go to Oahu and when they do come to Maui (even less) they play at the Hard Rock where I can’t go because it’s a bar. Damn! Well one day I’ll leave and be able to be a part of something. 

    • Charlie

      Come to Maui I agree!!

      • alana808

        I third this Hawaii idea. good call Sammy. 

  • Joanne Wolf

    I wish you could help me, I wish you were god.

  • Gothic_vampanda

    UMMMM Sadie,
    i can see where u are getting at with this, but it is no reason to go after somebody. SO what yeah she coudl get married easier cause it is male to female marriage, Religion has polluted the idea of marriage in my opinion, it has is some shape or form been going on for all of mankinds time.
    Treat people how you would want to be treated, os therefore u should be happy for her and supporting her because u know if you were gay and could get married to your lover you would want exactly the same thing. Dont judge somebody or be Against what they do just because it offends you, annnnd-
    IT FUCKING OFFENDS YOU REALLY???? I think u are to high stuck in your opinions you have no right to not be happy for her or to be unhappy with anybody marriage at that, you want to spread love and equality spread it now and dont stoop to some bible thumping idiot rednecks level by saying marriage in some sort of way is work.

  • Gothic_vampanda

    SHIT i meant
    ” If you want to spread love and equality spread it now and dont stoop to
    some bible thumping idiot rednecks level by saying marriage in some sort
    of way is wrong.”

    ps..i can say that about rednecks because i have lived Here in Texas since i was like 6 and im 20 now…Ive been around them my whole life and i get faced with their judgement too my sister inlaw and my brother and sister told me i needed to repent for being gay and doing gay things  becuase tehy are a bunch of BIBLE THUMPING JACKASSES( not completely gay im married to a very loving husband ^_^) but i still voe sister and brother atleast and im not going to stoop to their low ass level. im better then that they can be hypocrites and fill themselves and their world with hate while il stay happy and fill my world and life with love.

  • Isabella

    I have two questions:
    Is there any chance of Neil coming with you to the Amsterdam gig, given that he will still be with you in London just a few days before that one? It’d be so awesome if he did!

    Is any collaboration with Tim Minchin to be expected?

  • Charlotte Evans

    My Fringe recommendations are: Frisky and Mannish, James Sherwood, Bridget Christie, Josie Long, Henry Paker, Alex Horne, Stewart Lee, Richard Herring, Robin Ince and Simon Munnery.
    Have a wonderful time! Lots of love xxx

  • Mao Mischievous

    Dear Amanda,

    I have a question for you also. Is it possible that you/youandBrian/youandNiel/youandwhoever will ever back it back down here in the Southeastern states? I’m trapped in Knoxville, and sadly can’t teleport or I would just poof to see you guys.

  • Franzi

    Hi Amanda

    I’d resolved not to ask you about this since I was pretty sure it’d got buried under the landslide of awesome that is your life, but now you’re opening up to questions, I have to ask: 

    I met you briefly at the Evelyn Evelyn gig last year at Koko’s that turned into an AFP gig because of the ash cloud. I gave you a folder which contained an academic paper I wrote about you called “Truth or Dare: Amanda Palmer, Tori Amos and Methods of Feminist Catharsis”. I told you I was giving the paper at a conference on Gender and Difference in Cardiff the following month. You asked me to video it and put it up on vimeo. I did have someone film me but that person turned out to be useless and unreliable and I never got a copy. 

    So my question is, did you ever get round to reading it? Do you still have it? Would you read it if I emailed it? < yeah, in like 3 years, the way things are going with your emails!!

    And for the record, I think that while it sucks that queer peeps can't marry – at least not everywhere and not with same rights as straight couples – I don't understand why that should stop anyone else doing it. Some people don't have enough food, that doesn't mean I should stop eating. As for the Feminist issue – this question of you somehow going back on what you've said about relationships and marriage, it's very silly. If someone has a problem with your marrying someone so soon after a song like Ampersand, well, they are missing the point – big time! You don't wanna be just the other side of some equation, like you don't make sense or even exist unless the other person is there. Well, if your marriage to Neil hasn't proved that it's possible be in love and still be YOU I don't know what will. I've never seen two people in the public eye maintain so much of their individuality. I intend to marry in the future – either to a boy or a girl, jury's still out on that one – and I can only hope it will be as healthy, romantic, fulfilling and open as your marriage is!

    Good luck with the mountain of emails!

    Franzi (Francesca Lewis)

  • Camila João

    amanda palmer will you come to brazil?

  • Kambriel

    I think Noah is awesome for caring enough about his friend (and perhaps the others in there) to get you go play a show in the mental ward.  I’ve long believed the people in places like that really aren’t for the most part that much “crazier” than people on the outside… They just made a worse mistake, got caught for that mistake, had people who were more worried about them/couldn’t care for them, etc… As to kindness and music though?  I think all that still comes through as plain as day for the majority, and most of all, they’d appreciate someone treating them as “normal”, not a special/insane case.  Just do the show, and have some irreverent fun with it so they’ll be able to enjoy that taste of life beyond the walls and have fun with it alongside you.

  • Jamie Lee

    I think you should play the prison gig if you want (I’d love to see the footage).  I can’t imagine any other artist doing it, and pulling it off fantastically.  As for making people happy with your music, I have to say all of your music makes me happy.  Even the songs that other people would find utterly depressing.  It’s fucking fantastic to know that YOU are a real person and you write about real things with such poignancy.  Your songs take me to the dark corners of my mind that I don’t like to revisit, but need to just to stay sane and remind myself that I can do far more… and be so much more.  And seeing you attain such success in life, it gives me hope for my future.  Not that I’ll be rocking out and traveling the world, but the most recent song that has struck a cord with me of yours is “In My Mind” it’s so moving, like all of your music.  You have a way with words, being real and utterly relatable (for me at least).  Anyway, I’ll stop rambling before I write a novel.  I just wanted to say thank you, so very much, for making me happy with the music you make.  It’s sheer poetry with amazing music to accompany it… I love it.

    • gattopardo

      here here Jamie. Well said, I second every word wholeheartedly! 



    As for the prison thing, as long as you wear something fitted, i’m sure the inmates will be happy no matter what you play. Then you will know what it feels like to have a room full of people that want to jump your bones. Oh wait, i’m sure that’s true for everyone of your audiences. 

  • Joe

    Check out my friends Shoshi and Kim while you’re in Scotland. They’ll be street performing as Sidetracked-Baglady Theater. You’ll love it!

  • Kate

    I saw on Neil’s blog that you’re both planning to do a stop in Portland, OR on your tour after Halloween. I just want to make a plug for Eugene – it’s smaller, a couple hours south of PDX, but filled with really weird, creative folks that would be thrilled to have you, even for an hour. Might be a great stop for a ninja gig!

    • Jar

      oh hells ya, id love it if you came anywhere in the pacific northwest again but id freak if it was Eugene :D

  • C Rooky

    as always your blogs put me in the room you are in and i feel like i am squeezed on the edge of your chair. you are open, honest, raw and beautiful. you are lonely and speak it (he will like the toucan) and you love your friends. may the road you walk always have hills you can’t see over but from the top of each be smooth and lined with friends and adventure and music and art and all good things. my love to you from my desk in oz. surrounded by all the things i love.  crooky. xox

  • Andrea Probert

    Your music helps make me happy.

  • Jeana Dawn

    “you might be shocked to hear that not everybody in the world
    is supportive of the fact that i got married. sometimes i feel like i have to
    defend the action.”

    Dear Amanda,
    In a way, I am shocked. 
    Maybe I still have some naivety left within me – I doubt it, but
    maybe.  It might be nice to find that
    within myself so many years after I thought it gone.  Then again, the world is a rather large
    platform that is all inclusive of the entire human race and no one can please everyone…

    But marriage isn’t about pleasing everyone.  It’s about yourself and your partner.  It’s about wanting something more between the
    two of you that is your right to have.

    There are some that may be bitter and jealous because they
    do not have the right to marry whom they wish, and I am in no way condemning those
    emotions – or even the verbalizations of such emotions because without feeling,
    emotion, and especially the right to verbalize such things, we would be a
    stagnant group of people.  We would never
    move forward and forward motion is so very important.

    But we do not gain freedom for others by denying ourselves
    our own freedoms. 

    Others may resent the fact that you married because,  in their minds,  marriage is a domesticated hell that your
    music has given them temporary escape from. 
    You, through your music, have given them a hope they otherwise might not
    have had.  And now, in their minds, you’ve
    fallen into the inescapable trap. They’re afraid you’ll lose your voice.

    But marriage has not taken your voice away, it has made it

    We are allowed to evolve as people.  Make decisions at thirty that we never would
    have imagined at twenty. 

    Most importantly is that you find happiness in whichever way
    best works for you.  Live your life the
    way you want to live it.  Create art in
    the way you see fit to create it. 

    You cannot always please everyone, but at the end of the day
    it’s your own reflection in the mirror that you have to face.


  • Becca Sklar

    My question for you is, how do you deal with the criticism and/or pure insults that you get from fans and people who just randomly come across your work? Both on your physical appearance and your music/performances. Has anything ever struck a bad nerve with you and actually made you feel really bad about yourself?

  • Becca Sklar

    Sorry for the third comment on here lol. But I was just watching a video of you on youtube, and its kinda old but you said you were open to suggestions on how to sell your music where its the fans supporting the artist (I didn’t know where else to say this to you so thats why its here). Well I just got into this band One-Eyed Doll. And I love how they set up their way to help fans and so the fans can help them The link leads to one of their albums and how they sell it. They let you download any of their albums for free, or, if you clicked the link, different prices that you decide on what to give and depending on that number you get more items with it. Such as if you order the cd for $20 you get an autographed and bitten cd. Or if you go to $200, Kimberly (the singer of the band) will make a personal song diary for you plus the autographed cd.

    Well I hope this gives you some ideas (if you didn’t already think of this stuff) =D

  • Agent Phoenix

    hey lovely lady,

    sent a tweet to your fantastic husband informing him (and the world) that people outside of the USA can access by using a browser with Tor  ( easy to configure and GREAT to browse anonymously. everyone should join the Tor revolution anyway, but here’s a step-by-step to use it for

    just change the parameters for things like BBC iPlayer and such. KEEP THE INTERNET FREE and SAFE.

    unfortch, this means the already fragile servers will be hit even harder, but maybe this will show them how POPULAR and FUN their site is…and how much the WORLD wants to enjoy it.

    keep up the great work and hopefully, i can hope over to Edinburgh (or another show) to finally see you live. 

    ~agent phoenix

  • Josh

    What does ‘eyes full of ketchup’ mean (in Ampersand)? It’s been vexing me for a few years and I’m dying to know.

  • Jackie

    Re: wedding blog – interesting comments about the struggle to write something that is your usual mix of personal and celebratory, with the added burden of being both apologetic and informative. It’s funny, but when neither you nor Neil posted blog entries about The Event, I started to wonder: you are two people who lead their lives very, very publicly, basically live-streaming your day-to-day activities for a seemingly insatiable audience.  Could it be that you’d both finally done something that was so personal and intimate, so precious and close to your hearts and souls, that you found yourselves wanting to protect the memory of it and finally draw a curtain of privacy around at least this one moment in your lives?  Is there actually a line, and would writing about your wedding cross that line?

    Perhaps the tack to take with your Wedding Blog is “sometimes it’s just us,” and explain to us not why you married, but why sometimes you don’t have to share, or explain.  If you’ve done what’s right for you, then that should be enough. And sometimes things are just between two people and their families and friends, and while you love your fans and welcome their presence in your life, some things are just for you.

    Just a thought.

  • Sapphire McCracken

    I often feel left out as well. I live in Wichita, KS. I saw the Dresden Dolls once, years ago, in Kansas City, and I was lucky to see that show as I was 18 and broke. People in my city don’t know you!!! They need to know you!! Well, my whole family knows you (hehe) I force them to listen to you. I love doing that!

  • June_Miller

    ‘i imagined myself sitting there in a prison in front of a few hundred
    inmates, some of them certified insane, probably none of them not
    knowing or giving a fuck “who i am,” and i found myself thinking: could i
    make them happy? seriously? how would i do it? and why would they care?
    especially in you’re in for life. like – how much do the bragging
    rights actually matter?’

    First, I’ve watched far too many episodes of Lockup: Raw. 

    Secondly, yeah dude, they’re in prison.  They never see anything outside the walls, their cells, barely ever see their old friends or family or girlfriends or boyfriends or whatever, so I mean…having a pretty girl come by and sing catchy tunes is, if anything, a distraction for them.  Some of them would definitely enjoy it for the entertainment purposes, some would just like to ogle a chick.  If anything, you can bond over art with a couple of them because, let’s face it: you’re in jail, the healthiest thing you can do there aside from working out is make art.  Some are rappers, some play guitar, some paint, and some do the ghetto prison tats and, if they’re good enough, become tattoo artists when/if they get out.

    Also The Cramps played at Napa State Mental Hospital, not too far from my old neck of the woods.  And that sounded like a perfect, perfect gig–for them, especially.

    Also also I think Gaga would pull some shit off, if she did a prison gig.  Personally speaking.

    ‘you might be shocked to hear that not everybody in the world is
    supportive of the fact that i got married. sometimes i feel like i have
    to defend the action. i’ve looked at the blog and wondered if that
    defensiveness is informing at all. because it can’t. it shouldn’t. so i
    am wishy-washy. it’ll come out when the time is right. it’ll be the
    right time.’

    If you’re someone in the public eye, especially someone who can attract some pretty hardcore fans, it’s smart and safe to play it like that.  I mean, hell, we just touched on you performing in a prison because one of your fans is in there, in a mental ward.  *Not* saying all AFP fans are psychotic fucks, but we *are* a little off.  It can be unnerving, if not handled correctly.  I think your relationship should be respected, though.  It’s handled with class. 

    I was speaking with a friend, Sunday night, about how numerous straight people/couples seem to be the ones who only think of the sexual aspect when it comes to homosexual relationships.  They don’t think of the love or caring or tender aspects, just the pants drop and the fucking, and what happens around that.  My personal belief as far as why: the majority of straight folk are so concerned with the act of sex, and copulating, because it’s much more accessible to them, that they can’t focus on anything else.  Sex is an act where your brain’s supposed to be off and everything’s primordial, and they only know the one way; they don’t understand the mechanics of gay/lesbian sex, I guess.  They have to KNOW what it is we do, in our bedrooms, without actually experiencing it. 

    So how would homosexual fans of yours only being concerned with that, in your marriage, be any different or less judgmental than the countless straight couples who have tried to rub shit in my face about their own sex life in very obnoxious, purposely hurtful/dickish ways? 

    You guys aren’t assholes about how you care about each other.  It’s obvious you’re not trying to hurt anyone just by being together.  It’s unfortunate some people refuse to see it as that.

    edit: And for the record: brains are on par with tits/beautiful bodies, as far a sexiness is concerned, personally. Thinking/thoughtfulness is sexy. But tits are awesome, too.

    Thanks for explaining, I was wondering about that..  I noticed a couple DJ friends of mine were playing around with it on Facebunk, and I saw you promote it so…I may have a new site to check out this weekend. 

    Also I’d like to get AFP fans input on Industrial music, any Industrial music (new/old/up’n’coming/whatever) because I trust this fan base’s taste, musically, and I’m working in nicely with the Industrial kids, but I’m still super, super picky about what to check out/play. 

    Angelspit is the fucking shit, as far as newer stuff goes.  Just sayin’.  Listen to their remixes of “Sleep Now” and “Princess Chaos,” if anyone wants to have an oontz dance party.  Pretend to wear rivet goggles (or actually wear them, if one were so inclined) and shake it/stomp around.

    ‘neil and i are indeed plotting a little neil-and-amanda hit the west
    coast tour for early november. i’m about to announce a west coast
    halloween show with jason webley, too. neil and i will DEFINITELY be
    hitting san francisco, and i expect all these tickets will vanish soon
    after going on sale, so your best bet to get tickets, as always, is to
    get on the MAILING LIST, where we alway announce first.’

    You guys should make an appearance at Death Guild and send all the little goth industrial childrens’ hearts a-twitter. 

    …or The Box.  Holla!

    (But Death Guild would probably be a bit more hoppin’.)

    Either way, that’s a lovely time to be out here.

    Looking forward to hearing the new material, it sounds like it’s gonna be rockin’.  Good job biting the bullet and knocking it out.  And we do dance.  Hard.  I’m still kind of preparing for the day I get in a dance-off with “Map of Tasmania” girl.  My hips don’t lie.

  • Ryan_Anas

    It sounds like both an exciting and scary time right now. The thing about stopping and decompressing life is that those compressed corners are always a little more scary in our minds than they end up being in real life. I love how you were able to motivate yourself into finishing these songs by creating the gigs at which they were to be played. It’s the ultimate form of positive visualization. You had to win in order to go forward. And win you did. The new songs are just AHHHHH!

    Adventures are awesome. Memories are not planted in a perfect world. The only regret to be had on that ferris wheel would be if no one broke into a number about golden showers filling your eyes! 

    I like how you described the direction you have taken in your career. I have lived my life in very much the same fashion for the past few years. Allowing myself to follow my heart in much the same way the toucan cereal mascot of my youth would follow his nose to the red die number five soaked corn rings. Sometimes I fear I’m drifting and slowly being sucked into a black hole where judgement for my lack of planning will spagetify me into nothingness. But then I remember the years of planning and enduring tortures to my heart and soul for things I never really wanted in the first place, and I’m grateful. I was born with a wisdom, and anytime I do not heed it, I am made a fool.

    Your band is kind of the best!

    <3<3 Ry

  • Leanne

    I don’t know about shows in Edinburgh, but if you’ve got time off in London and you want to see a show I can give you a few suggestions.  Right now, The Globe’s producing Dr. Faustus and it’s fantastic.  Giant puppet dragons, men on stilts wearing cow skulls representing Hell’s demons, lots of drums!, brilliant acting, samurai angels and devils, it was visually stunning.  The Donmar’s got Luise Miller, which is a kind of Romeo and Juliet story except it’s more politically motivated and focuses on the corrupt courts of 18th c. Germany.  The Hampstead Theatre’s doing a new play called American Trade, which is really raw and goes out of it’s way to try to offend people, which is awesome.  It basically comments on how the media and the music industry destroy intrinsically good people to generate business and make a profit.  The National Theatre’s got The Holy Rosenbergs, which is a kind of Death of a Salesman geared toward the Jewish community.  It centers around one family that gets torn apart by their community because of differing views on the Israeli Palestinian conflict.  All four are worth seeing, if you’re even going to have the time.  Hope you have an awesome tour!  -Leanne

  • Tamirawhite

    I hope your new album has “The Bed Song” on it :) you played it when i saw you with Evelyn Evelyn in LA last spring and it made me cry. Most beautiful ever. I love you and love that you are alwasy doing something! Will follow you for the rest of my life. Keep rockin! :)

  • Casey Selley

    Man, I’m late on the comments here. 

    Amanda, I’ve been a fan for a long time and quite frankly- i’m OVERJOYED that you met Neil and I’m SO happy for you that you got married.  

    this is going to sound retarded so fair warning in advance. 

    I know you’ve been through a lot of BS relationship wise and so have I. Knowing that you finally found someone you love enough to make a commitment to (and who loves you back) is inspiring. Wonderful for you!  

    As for those that are unable to be married yet,
    Just because Amanda has gotten married doesn’t mean she doesn’t see your plight, or support it. You can be married and try and fight for other people’s rights to do so!! In fact, I kind of think that a whole bucket load of people not being married to support the cause of marriage is counter productive. 

    If you’re a fan, then stop being a fan, and be a friend. A friend loves you for who you are and supports your choices. 

    As a totally unrelated side note:  The reason you make music should always be for yourself. If you just stopped making music today because YOU didn’t want to anymore- I’d totally get it. Live for one person. 

    2nd unrelated side note: Holy crap. It’s about time you cleaned ^_~

  • Lang

    This is super delayed, but I’ve been sans internet for an age.

    “is it good to make a lot of people happy a little? or a little people
    happy a lot? is it possible to make a lot of people happy a lot? does it even matter? am i even making music to make people happy? why the fuck am i making music?”

    To answer a question about performance with a song:

    It’s a good one.

    Now to take you up on your offer of shameless self-promotion:

    Within your mountain of e-mails is an invitation to a show I’m in at the Fringe, but because it’s likely that the e-mail won’t be excavated until the Fringe is past, I’m putting a bit of it here:

    It’s a show called ‘The Scene of the Titans’ ( If you have the time and the inclination, check it out. The website can”t do justice
    to how much fun it is. I swear by the hairs on my chinny-chin-chin.
    There are so brilliantly many shows going on, and ones far, far more
    professional than ours, but if the mood strikes you to see something
    full of heart, wit, gaiety, exuberant fun, and drag queens, then stop on
    by. It may have a large part to do with the experience of bringing a
    show from a partially-completed script entirely into life, but if the
    audience members enjoy it as much as I am enjoying it backstage and
    onstage, they’ll be piddling themselves with glee.

    All That Needs To Be Said:

    a (really good) STUDENT-WRITTEN MUSICAL based on the TRUE STORY of the
    Ulster Titans- a ragtag bunch of GAY NORTHERN IRISHMEN who decided to
    start a RUGBY team and go on to compete in an INTERNATIONAL

    Further Tempting Tidbits:

    *The rugby team started in a gay bar in Northern Ireland called The Kremlin.

    Kremlin, and subsequently the team, is run by a fierce drag queen named
    Sofia with a fascination- fixation?- with Soviet Russia.

    *There is a song entitled “Gay Gospel”, featuring Jesus in all her glory.

    *Another name for a team’s outfit is their “strip”, and the show makes good use of the pun.

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